Movies you missed when you were a teenager
Turn Me On, Dammit!
Unapologetic about teen girls’ burning sexual desires, Norwegian film Turn Me On, Dammit! is a refreshing tell-it-like-it-is story about a sexually starving 15-year-old named Alma. Behind her mum’s back, she rings up sex hotlines to get off. It staves her appetite for a while, but she longs for a physical connection. Alma lusts after Arthur, a cripplingly shy boy who is the perfect cocktail of anxious and virile. However, when the pair do come together, it’s not exactly how she’d intended. She unwittingly tells her friends of the meet and the story gets out, turning her into a shunned vixen. This is maybe the funniest movie about sex after The Little Death.
Long story short – two boys join a track team and discover that they love to run just as much as the next friend of Dorothy (i.e. not very much). Their slavish dedication to the track team ends up being a welcome excuse to wear tight-fitting shorts and, ahem, ‘exercise’ on the regular. Luckily, there’s a pond nearby the track where they can cool off after an intense training session. This film is fairly innocent – its languid romance trumps any intervention of actual sex – but lawd does it fulfill every unticked box of a masc4masc love story.
Bang Gang (A Modern Love Story)
As the title suggests, horny French teen Alex hosts a sex party while his mum is away on a work trip. Because the participants are all of the Snapchat generation, they decide to film and upload everything to a password-protected site so they can rewatch and distribute at their leisure. They call themselves the “Bang Gang” (pronounced “Bong Gong” because it’s France). Bang Gang is like Bernardo Bertolucci’s The Dreamers sluttier, digital native sister. There is a ‘helicopter’ scene that would put the shock-horror of the surprise penis in the latest Game of Thrones episode to shame. Director Eva Husson manages to make group sex, and all its cautionary absolutes, into a total thrill ride.